'Pokemon: The STDmon' Not Selling Well

Nintendo of America Headquarters, Redmond, WA - Nintendo's latest effort to revive interest in Pokemon, the company announced, has not "been catching on." STDmon, the educational series combining sexual health information and Pokemon, has not found as wide a market as the company had hoped.

STDmon, which are featured on trading cards and in their own cartoon show, use varieties of traditional Pokemon trademark phrases, such as "I choose you, Gonorrhea!" and plotlines based on Pokemon characters chasing down evil villains and foiling their schemes, with characters like 'Syphilisaurus' and 'Herpemon.'

"Really, it's a product we're proud of," said Nintendo spokesperson Merv Digglish. "What better way to teach kids about the dangers of STDs than by turning them into lovable cartoon fantasy creatures? Honestly, after watching the demo tapes we use for focus groups, I half-believe my warts are cute and cuddly!"

Across the nation, readers of this article issued a collective "eewwwwww!!!" and vowed never to come back to this website again. At least not until next Monday.







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