Economy Finally Kills William Shatner

Brokeville - William Shatner, spokesperson for Priceline.com's cheap airfare rates, who died suddenly Friday in his home, was apparently killed by the economic recent downturn. The autopsy report indicated that Shatner's washed-upness, plus the steady decline of the dot-com economy, combined with the fast drop of the airline industry, finally killed the actor.

Shatner's paychecks, which had diminished to just over 4 cents every month, were not enough to keep the failing actor alive. Friends said shortly after his death that he had been living on solely "Spaghetti-O's and nostalgia." The actor was rigged to a retro-appeal life support system shortly after the major airlines announced job cuts, but to no avail.

Shatner's corpse will be ejected from the Enterprise in a space-casket, and will be aimed so that it lands in a burial yard of other broke-ass stars including MC Hammer, Right Said Fred, and the plot already designated for the entire cast of 'Friends.'







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