Fine Line List: Bad Jokes Involving Afghani Place Names

It's amazing, well, sad, actually, what happened when we opened an atlas to try to learn more about what's going on in the world. We started with the idea to expand public knowledge of currently pertinent geography, but we ended up making jokes that have nothing to do with the names except how they're spelled. And even so, we left out the accents. We'll just save ourselves the time and say we're sorry now: Reader, we apologetically give you some bad jokes involving Afghani place names!

Kandahar
No, the test wasn't Kandahar, it was really hard!
What Kandahar do you drive?
Kandahar?! But I don't even know her!

Kabul
We pay way too much for Kabul these days!
Kabul? KABOOM!!!

Meymaneh
Said the Canadian man, "Meyman, eh?"
Some hooligan stole Meymaneh!

Sheberghan
Line from the Afghani version of "The Music Man": 'Sheberghan, Sheberghan, Sheberghan, the girl wears a veil!"
Kids these days, always up to some sort of Sheberghans.
Sheberghans, she haggles, she annoys shopkeepers in general.
Most Afghanis hate Americans but love Chevy Sheberghans.

Ghazni
Ghazni? Didn't we blow that up in Yugoslavia?
Ghazni led the Afghani people to victory over the British empire.

Spin Buldak
Spin, Buldak, Spin!" chanted the Wheel of Fortune studio audience.
Spin Buldak: Just above "Rinse" on an Afghani washing machine.

Moqor
The only thing worse for you than cheap liquor is cheap Moqor.
Moqor, Less qor, it all ends up as the Status Qor.

Baraki Barak
Baraki Barak: Long-lost Israeli cousin of Mark E. Mark.
"Baraki Barak. Who's There? Baraki. Baraki Who? Baraki Barak!" - a really confusing Afghani joke.

Jalalabad
Jalabad!!! And you thought Jar-Jar sucked!
When someone daydreams, Afghanis say he's in Jalala-land!

Bala Bagh
Bala Bagh: Nowhere close to Bala Cynwyd! And nowhere close to Baghdad, either!
“Erin go Bala Bagh", said the Afghani Irishman.

Shindand
"Shindand?! He'sh the funniesht comedian I know!" - Sean Connery.
An Afghani's favorite dance banned by the Taliban: Shind And Shout.

Konduz
I can't believe they Konduz into this!
Don't buy time-share Konduz, especially not in Afghanistan.
Konduzeela Rice? Isn't she Bush's national security advisor or something?

Aybak
Right Aybak atcha.
Aybak, Ayfront, and two walls ... won't protect you from the smart missiles, I'm afraid.

Zibak
Zibak, relax, and enjoy the show!
Zibak: the offspring of a zebra and a yak.
Zibak of an Afghani woman looks like the front, under all those veils.







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